Wimping Out for Christmas

Listening to a lot of Christmas songs as I do, I have come to the conclusion that the silliest (and easily the most disappointing) may be, "Please Come Home for Christmas."  That's the soulful one that begins --

Bells will be ringing this sad sad New Years
Oh what a Christmas to have the blues
My baby's gone I have no friends
To wish me greetings once again

Mind you, it's a nice song for the most part, very good, in fact, one that packs more deeply heartfelt feeling than a dozen, basic Christmas songs combined, but goes off the deep end and loses all impact when it gets to probably the best-known and most emotional part.  That's when the singer tears deep into the essence of their great desire and powerful loss by singing pleadingly, begging with all their heart and building on the second line --

Please come home for Christmas
Please Come Home for Christmas

And then they always lose me with the next line --

If not for Christmas by New Year's night.

I mean, seriously, after all of that emotional begging, the person wimps out and pretty much loses the impact of their emphatic, heart-rending imploring and the case they're trying to make by giving the other person an out and some wiggle room.  The line is such a letdown.  It makes me wonder how much they really, really, really want the person home for Christmas if, well, y'know, after all, if you can't make it by Christmas, then, fine, some other time is okay.  Hey, if they can't make it New Year's night, would President's Day be all right?

Some singers make it even worse by really throwing themselves into the song and getting as soulful and overwrought as they possibly can and toss in a third cry of "Please come home from Christmas.  Please come home from Christmas!  Please come home from Christmas!!!"  And then blithely add their, "Or...well, whenever."

To me, it's sort of like if you were at an anti-war protest, and the mass of outraged protesters were marching and chanting --

What do we want?

Peace!

When do we want it?

Now!!  Or if not "now," pretty soon would be okay.

Or a district attorney finishing up a 20-minute, powerful, angst-laden summation by crying in near-exhuastion, "And so I ask you, ladies and gentlemen of the jury, to find this heinous defendant guilty of murder.  Guilty of murder in the first degree!!  But if not murder, than involuntary manslaughter."

Yes, getting peace pretty soon would be far, far better than years from now, but it sort of diminishes the impact of the angst, outrage and demand.  And manslaughter is significantly better than the killer getting off scot free, but it diminishes your insistence that he's guilty of murder.

And coming home New Year's night would be romantic and world's better than not coming home ever again.  But after all that emotional pleading of "Please come home for Christmas!!!", I just want to yell at the singer, "C'mon, stick to your guns.  It's clear you really want the person home by Christmas.  Don't weasel out.  Stay strong.  Don't let the other person think the time doesn't matter and that it's all up to them, whatever they decide, you'll be there waiting anxiously at the door."  Hey, if they don't make it home for Christmas, it's pretty obvious that you want them home whenever they can make it.  It's not like you're singing --

Please come home for Christmas
Please come home for Christmas
If not for Christmas then not at all.

If you're going to throw yourself prostrate on the ground begging for your love to please come home for Christmas -- stick to it!  Anything less weakens your plea.

And the song.