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Decent Quality Since 1847

A Story with No Teeth

1/20/2015

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There's been an odd news story in the world of sports where Tiger Woods was spotted in a photograph to be missing a tooth.  He had gone to Italy where his girlfriend Lindsey Vonn was competing in a World Cup skiing tournament, and she won, giving her a record 63 World Cup victories.  But it was the photo that got almost as much attention.
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The only explanation has come from his agent, Mark Steinberg, who said that the incident occurred at the awards ceremony when a photographer's camera accidentally banged into Woods's tooth, knocking it out.

Now, to be clear, I couldn't care less why Tiger Woods lost a tooth, even with his past-history of domestic issues.  And Ms. Vonn has been very supportive and concerned for the lost tooth.  What I do care about is getting lied to and treated like a sap, which is what the agent's explanation does.

I mean, seriously now.  Forgetting for the moment that the explanation is odd, and not many people are buying it because it seems too odd, I don't buy for a specific reason that no one in the media has mentioned.  At least as far as I've seen.  

Okay, this is at a World Cup skiing tournament.  It's at the awards ceremony.  There are cameras all over -- not just from the professionals, like the one who supposedly banged into Woods, but also all the spectators will cell phones, no doubt thrilled to be photographing and videotaping the world famous golfer, hoping maybe to get him on film with his famous skier girlfriend....

And there are no pictures of the photographer smashing into Tiger Woods??!  And no picture of Woods looking for his missing tooth, or blood spurting out all over the place???  Seriously?  You expect us to believe that?!!

As it happens, the secretary general of the tournament -- concerned with security -- doesn't believe it either, and said that it didn't happen, that Woods was nowhere near the ceremony, but in the finish-line tent.  In fact, he said that Woods and Von had requested extra security, it was provided, and the fellow himself escorted Woods from the tent to a waiting snowmobile.  "And there was no such incident."

Again, I don't care where the tooth is.  Maybe he walked into a tree and felt embarrassed by it.  I just don't like it when stories are made up, especially ones as lame as that one.
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    Robert J. Elisberg is a political commentator, screenwriter, novelist, tech writer and also some other things that I just tend to keep forgetting. 

    Elisberg is a two-time recipient of the Lucille Ball Award for comedy screenwriting. He's written for film, TV, the stage, and two best-selling novels, is a regular columnist for the Writers Guild of America and was for
    the Huffington Post.  Among his other writing, he has a long-time column on technology (which he sometimes understands), and co-wrote a book on world travel.  As a lyricist, he is a member of ASCAP, and has contributed to numerous publications.



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