So, some of you who have been wandering around these halls for a while may remember that back in January, I wrote here about getting bed bugs in my home. It was an annoying process for all to deal with, of course -- packing everything up into bags to empty shelves so that they can be sprayed and washing all the clothes and drycleaning all the woolens and such. And living out of a few bags for the next five weeks until the three required spraying could be completed.
It's now September, and the exterminator has been coming back every couple of months since then, and he's back again today. Because there are still freaking bed bugs in the place.
Happily not many. (Well...not many compared to before. Not compared to most normal humans. For most normal humans if they saw just one they'd leap in concern.) And happily they've been limited to just a couple of areas. But these suckers just won't go away. Though I do think the end is in sight. Most of the bugs I've seen over the past week have been teensy babies, and just one adult. So...it seems we're getting there. Of course, just because no one has seen them doesn't mean they're not lurking when nobody here is looking. But I'm an optimistic guy, so I do think we're nearing the end.
(You'll note that I said three different versions of "I think the end is in sight" in the previous paragraph. How much of this is wishful thinking and how much is reality we'll find out. I may think it, but alas this is not a belief system.)
The problem was, as the pest control guy Del said on that first day oh-so long ago now was that I had an infestation. And that came about for a good and bad reason.
Bed bugs, as we all know, bite. That's where we get the doggerel, "Good night, sleep tight, don't let the bed bugs bite." But there are apparently about 10% of the population who don't get bitten. And wherever they were congregating, I wasn't getting bitten.
That's been the good. It's nice not to get bitten by bed bugs. (Or...okay, bitten by anything.)
The bad is that when you're not getting bitten...you don't know you have bed bugs. There'd be some odd little signs, but they meant nothing to anyone. So, the odd little signs got sloughed off. For many months. All the while not having the slightest idea bed bugs were congregated in the place.
The little suckers stayed hidden, and there just wasn't any ohter clue. All the while they were partying.
Well, the party does seem to be over. I hope. It seems that way, at least. And so there is rejoicing all around. But it means leaving the place for four hours. Again. But then, this has become almost a sort of tradition here, vagabonding about town for four hours, something that will almost me missed by all when it ends.
But not really. Enough already.
And so, my good buddy Del is coming back shortly. We've all become very close at this point, indeed I wouldn't be surprised if start exchanging holiday cards and gifts, along with attending births in the families. Since he returned that first time after the normal three visits/one month and he figured that's it, he's all done, he's said that he will keep coming back until the suckers are all gone. I admire his diligence. And relentlessness. And honor in being committed to his job. I just wish he'd make the bugs go away!!! And...and...I think he will at last. Or eventually.
We shall see...
Robert J. Elisberg is a political commentator, screenwriter, novelist, tech writer and also some other things that I just tend to keep forgetting.
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