"It's my experience that most people who do, never are.
And then to protect myself, I added, "I'm not saying this critically or in support, just making an observation."
And honestly, I wasn't being critical, because I didn't know her definition of "sometimes" and "too much." Talking too much on occasion can be because you're simply excited about a subject or just get carried away. Or are bubbly and lively, and every once in a while it just spills out.
And "too much" covers a wide swath. Is it more than you generally feel comfortable talking? Or more than makes others listening comfortable? And is it for like an extra 30-seconds -- or a monologue so long that it would make Eugene O'Neill uncomfortable?
But sometimes talking too much is perfectly fine.
It is also my experience that most people who say, "I sometimes talk too much," are saying that because they always talk far too much and have no filter. (Most, I said. Not everyone who does. Life is full of exceptions.) After all, if you only talk a bit too much sometimes, most people don't feel a need to make an issue of it needing a full-blown, cover-all apology for how they speak. Because there isn't a need to. It doesn't require an apology. Something that's occasional, brief, and over might might even be interesting of fun. If that person feels that on that occasion they want to say, "Oops, sorry for going on so long," fine, it's personal choice. Not necessary, but thought. But it's in the moment, not something that calls for a bumper sticker. It's only when it's your default way of speaking that you feel it's, oh, y'know, worth perhaps mentioning because people are always complaining.
Which brings us to what is the complaint part.
Always talking way too much is, of course, rude and thoughtless. You might be okay with it, because it's who you are -- but then, that's the point of being someone who always talks much too much. If you weren't okay with it, you wouldn't do it. But "who you are" is someone who likes to hear themselves talk all the time. Because, to yourself, you're so incredibly interesting and funny and insightful and heartfelt. And don't care what anyone else around you says. Which is the point of "rude and thoughtless." The other people there. Other people who, even if they find you interesting, funny, insightful and heartfelt, still want to be part of the conversation and offer their own views. Not everyone, some people are taciturn or shy about talking. But in general, when talking with other people, most people like to talk. That's the point of conversation. As opposed to soliloquies.
Always talking far too much is telling others -- "My thoughts are the most important and significantly more important than yours. Your thoughts and time and interests don't really matter to me. But mine do, And so, I'm going to talk too much -- and I'm not sorry."
So, no, it wasn't shocking that Miss Amanda was not sorry. Just that she proudly wanted to tell us that she talked to much, and wanted to be sure we knew.
By the way, to my surprise, I was not slammed by a stream of people in response to my reply to Amanda's comment. In fact, only one person even responded.
It was Amanda.
She "Liked" it.