I love watching sports. I enjoy NFL football. I will not be watching the Pro Bowl all star game today. But then, I haven't watched the Pro Bowl in a few years. ("Few" will be defined here as at least 30.) I've caught replays now and then, and they're so embarrassing that it's kept confirming my decision. Few all star games are terribly entertaining, no athlete ever appears to be trying their hardest, but the games generally have a connection to the actual sport. In baseball, maybe the pitcher isn't throwing at 95 MP, but no batter only swings halfway. He's trying to hit the ball, just like in a real game. In basketball, zero defense is played -- but offense certainly is. Hockey can be problematic, but even if you're not playing at full speed and crashing into the boards, it's near-impossible for these guys to skate slow. But the Pro Bowl? It's like watching a pick-up flag football game. It makes the Indoor Football League look impressive. Unfortunately, the boring play is understandable. These guys just finished getting pounded for 16 games that actually count. Why in the world would you want to risk injury in a came that doesn't remotely matter. And unlike the other sports who play their all star games at the halfway point of the season, when players are not only at their peak, but have to remain there for the second half -- the Pro Bowl is played when the season is over. The players are finished, physically and more importantly, mentally. There's no game next week, it's done. And so they play at what looks like quarter speed. If that, on some plays. This is four minutes of "highlights" from last year's Pro Bowl. That's far too much. There might be some nice passes, but no one is rushing and no one is defending. But there is a lot of jogging. The only real reason to watch this for more than 30 seconds is because the announcers are in Portuguese. Seriously. It's the one thing that makes this entertaining. There's pretty much only two reasons they keep playing the Pro Bowl, from what I've read. One is that it would be embarrassing to the league not to have one. And the others is that players' wives like the free trip to Hawaii. But honestly, these players makes a few million dollars a year, I think they can afford a trip to Oahu. And the quality of play has to be more embarrassing to the NFL than not playing.
My first reaction is that they should cancel the Pro Bowl. Put it out of its misery. But if they really do want an event and give a treat to the families of those selected, maybe instead they should re-address what the event is. Turn it into something like what the NBA does the two days before the basketball all-star game, which are basically a series of "skills competitions," like the dunk contest. Come up with some entertaining skills competitions for football and leave it at that. There doesn't have to be an all-star game. They just should have something that's actually semi-worth watching.
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I love Bob & Ray. And this is one of my favorites. Their interview with the president of the STOA, which stands for...well, you'll hear. I had only one semi-path crossing with the team. Or half the team. Years back, Bob Eliot and Ray Goulding were scheduled to have an event at, I believe, the Museum of Broadcasting. Only Bob was able to make it, because Ray was too ill at the time. I rarely ask questions at such events, but did on that night. I got called on in the audience and asked why it was "Bob and Ray," and not "Ray and Bob." He laughed and said, "Y'know, I don't think we've ever been asked that." He didn't exactly remember the reason at that point, but the best he could come up with was along the lines of, "At the time, we were doing a radio show in Boston, and there was a little promo they used, 'Start your day, with Bob and Ray,' because it rhymed." So, here's 3-1/2 minutes from their Broadway show, Bob and Ray: The Two and Only. Starring...Ray and Bob. In 1980, I saw a production in L.A. of The Music Man with Dick Van Dyke. He was wonderful, though miscast. I think the role of 'Harold Hill' plays best when he's a fast-talking city slicker, in 180-degree dramatic contrast with the easy-going, Iowa Stubborn citizens of River City. Dick Van Dyke is as far from a city slicker as there is. He came across in the show like a charming country bumpkin, almost one of them. As I said, he was absolutely terrific -- but for my taste, the wrong choice to play the role. But I'm sure glad I saw it. (While most interpretation is subjective, I think that what I'm noting here is more than just personal taste, but actually inherently written into the original material. After all, that's what "Ya Got Trouble" is. The blistering pace of that song shows that it is not remotely intended as a leisurely stroll in the park. That's a guy trying to steamroll naive people. And the centerpiece of the show, "76 Trombones" begins in a completely un-neighborly way, as 'Harold Hill' actually dares interrupt a town hall meeting and shouts at everyone, "Please, folks! May I have your attention, please! Attention, please!" In fact, in the very next line, he says the way he'll change the town is "with the wave of my hand, this very hand." That's the words of a mesmerizing magic wizard. And he's as big-city pushy trying to unrelentingly seduce 'Miss Marian' as an out-of-town stranger can be. Since much of 'Professor Hill" is indeed charming, playing the role with an "aw shucks" simplicity works at times. But overall, I just don't think it's how the character is written or best done.) Anyway, I just now tracked down seven minutes of it! The Marian the Librarian number. The quality is lousy, at times really lousy, but good enough and watchable enough to revel in seeing. And having as a historic record. There have been a lot of stories lately about people getting up in arms about not all of Subway's Footlong sandwiches being an exact foot. The Chicago Tribune has a story about some lawsuits being filed. I have mixed feelings on this -- and I must admit I haven't given it a whole lot of thought. On the one hand, I grasp that when a company advertises something, they should deliver. And it's good to hold corporations to such things. On the other hand --
First, at best, this strikes me as more an Federal Trade Commission sort of thing, not lawsuit world. Besides, how much does it cost to pursue a lawsuit, all for the sake that your sandwich might have been an inch short? Also, there are a lot of things worth getting up in arms in this life over. A sandwich maybe being an inch short sometimes doesn't make the list. And also, the company notes that "Footlong" is intended more descriptive than specific. Mind you, I'm not completely sure I buy that explanation, but there are plenty of things that are described one way and meant only as a description, not reality. I don't think someone is likely to drink a Big Gulp in just one huge sip. Besides, they have a Trademark insignia after the name Footlong™ -- which says to me, whatever their intent, that is...well, a Trademark. Not a stand-in for a ruler, should you lose yours. Also, regardless of the length of the bun, you can tell the server to keep piling on most anything for your sandwich you want. I've asked for extra pickles and olives, and they happily keep adding them. However, long the bread is. So, customers aren't necessarily losing an inch of sandwich on the times when the bun is short, just an inch of bread. (See point #2: prioritizing what to get up in arms over.) I have no problem with the subject being addressed with Subway. And no problem with the FTC making inquiries and resolving what Subway is doing and trying to do. And do think that something called a "Footlong™" ideally should be a foot long. But angst and lawsuits? I think some people have lives that are too empty trying to find meaning in the wrong places...or are hoping to be paid off to go away. I don't watch a lot of TV series regularly, checking in every week, but one that I did was Suits on the USA Network. It wasn't exactly a guilty pleasure, since I didn't feel especially guilty about it. The dialogue was smart, the characters well drawn, and the acting was quite good almost across the board. Many series hire beautiful actresses for window dressing, but on Suits the casting director and producers should get an Emmy simply for doing something rare for TV -- finding beautiful actresses who are all terrific actresses. The failings I found with the show is that they got a bit too distracted for my taste with the soap opera sub-plots and ignored the legal cases, which were generally quite interesting, but often handled in a too-cursory manner. Also, I wished that they'd accept their own premise -- that a brilliant young man didn't go to law school, but read through all the law books and was good enough to pass bar exams he took for others. And he gets hired knowingly by a hot shot lawyer to a prestigious firm as a supposed Harvard grad. If they accepted their premise, unbelievable as it is, and then just moved on, it was fun to watch. But in periodically putting the guy in jeopardy of being found out...that was always problematic for me, because if they were going to get that believable, then things could only fall apart and get bizarrely convoluted...because the premise is utterly unbelievable. So, just accept your unbelievable premise and move on. But okay, I could accept that, sort of. Up to a point. And the point got passed in the first episode of the second season. I was looking forward to it, but not only did the soap opera sub-plot aspect (will they-won't they-will they-won't they) get ratcheted up (yet again) and not only was he put in jeopardy at being found out (yet again) in the most obvious way -- a prospective hire at the firm who went to Harvard at the same time didn't recognize him (gee, go figure), but the case at hand dealt around the issue of honesty, and the young associate got so unrelentingly over-the-top about how deceitful the firm was being in winning a case that he went and risked an act that would have put any lawyer at risk...and then continued to berate the others at the firm for their dishonesty and duplicity, to the extent that it looked like it could be a continuing theme. And I thought to myself, "Say what?? This is a guy who is lying about not having gone to law school and lying about not having passed the bar, and every case he is involved with would be thrown out of court if he was ever discovered and his firm would be destroyed and people might even be jailed -- and he's yammering on and on and on about honesty??!!"
And I took the series off my my DVR's series list. I'll keep an eye on it, and if an individual episode looks look, I'll check in on it. Because the show has smart dialogue, interesting characterizations, and good acting. But it just got far too convoluted for its own good. I don’t have much to say about this, but the video is far too wonderful to let it pass unnoted. The BBC Proms are a legendary British tradition. They began in 1895 as a festival of outdoor summer concerts that featured classical music – some light, but mostly serious. They’re now largely done at the Royal Albert Hall and a few non-classical nights slip in some for the family (Wallace & Grommit had an evening this past year), and some might be with popular music or Broadway. Though they do tend to be “orchestral based.” The season winds up with Proms in the Park. This video comes for the Promos of this past summer, 2012. It’s an actor performing “Ya Got Trouble” from The Music Man. No big deal, of course, the song has been done hundreds of times. Robert Preston, of course, originated the role of ‘Harold Hill’ on Broadway and won a Tony Award for it, before recreating his legendary performance for the movie. The great Dick Van Dyke toured the country with the show and then took it to the City Center in New York. When the musical had a full-fledged revival 2000, Craig Bierko got a Tony nomination for his performance. Matthew Broderick recreated the classic role in the TV movie remake. And countless of other singing-and-dancing stars have performed “Ya Got Trouble” as part of their professional stage acts and in countless local productions. But this is performed by – Seth MacFarlane! The voice of ‘Stewie’ and ‘Ted’ and so many more. And the thing is…he’s wonderful! He’s clearly a little nervous, a touch out of his comfort zone. But he knows the song inside-out and where every joke should properly be hit. And this is no easy number to perform. As he walks out, you sit there wondering, geez, is he going to be able to pull this off?? And after about two bars, you smile and think, “He’s got it.” Obviously, he knows musicals and loves the show. I also watch this and think, “Wait, writers aren’t supposed to be able to do this. Writers are supposed to be the ones who write this and make other people look good doing this.” But there he is, doing this. Yes, I know he performs as a voice artist, but still – I’m a member of the Writers Guild of America. To me, Seth MacFarlane is a writer. First and foremost. The truth is that he’s trained in music. He’s even put out an album, Music is Better Than Words. And it was even nominated for a Grammy. He's performed with a big band. Singing is clearly a love of his, even if it's not a first career. Or second. But still...a 96-piece orchestra and choir backing you is a far cry from sitting alone in a room typing scripts, Or doing funny voices into a microphone. Or directing others, telling them what to do. This is you, with nowhere to run, doing it yourself. Without any trouble. |
AuthorRobert J. Elisberg is a political commentator, screenwriter, novelist, tech writer and also some other things that I just tend to keep forgetting. Feedspot Badge of Honor
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