Noem, Ma'am, is an Island
It turns out that Gov. Kristi Noem's (R-SD) "Killing the Puppy was OK" Reclamation Tour is getting worse (and yes, that's possible -- and yes, it's still going on) as she quintuples down at this point. And as she helps isolate herself from much of the caring world.
It's not that her story keeps changing as she tries to make "Cricket" seem more vicious than in her book (among other things, no longer talking about the puppy killing a couple of chickens as she writes in her book, but now referring to them as "livestock"), or that the story isn't just that she shot this apparently vicious puppy because she also shot and killed the family goat (who ruined her children's clothes), or that when she shot the family goat she first only wounded it but then had to go and find more ammunition while the goat suffered. Or that she killed three horses. Or that she could have trained the puppy better. Or kept the puppy in her car if she thought it was so vicious when she visited the farm with chickens. Or tried to place the puppy and goat in better homes. Or at the very least taken the puppy and goat to a vet who could more humanely ended their lives.
Now, it turns out that she also would like to see President Biden's dog Commander put down. Yes, really. Because it's bitten a lot of Secret Service men. Never mind that maybe the problem there is that Secret Service protecting the President of the United States carry guns and are tough and perhaps seem threatening to a dog, especially when trying to protect the President. And never mind that it's weird when someone goes public about killing someone else's dog -- especially as the first option.
But it's more than that. Because it also turns out that her book is full of literal lies. Like writing about staring down North Korean dictator Kim Jong-Un -- "I’m sure he underestimated me, having no clue about my experience staring down little tyrants (I’d been a children’s pastor after all)” she writes -- ...despite never actually having met him. And also writing about how she was "slated to meet" with French President Emmanuel Macron last November, but cancelled it when she believed he had made comments that she felt was too "pro-Hamas." As it happens, Macron's office has said that no such meeting was ever scheduled. Which makes it a bit hard to cancel.
Noem also writes that she was “slated to meet” with Macron in November last year while she was in Paris for a conference of European conservative leaders, but later canceled when he made comments that she considered “pro-Hamas.”
There are some other mistakes (or lies) that the publisher has said will all be fixed before actually publishing the book. Mistakes (or lies) all in service of her effort to seem really tough. As she tries desperately to become Trump's running mate. Which is pretty clear now is not going to happen. But that appears to be the reason behind her desperate "Killing the Puppy was OK" Tour.
By the way, when you've even put off Trump for being too cruel (the man who pushed for taking migrant children from their parents and putting them in cages), you know you've gone maniacally too far and quarantined yourself alone so distant from everyone else that they're afraid of getting infected by just being anywhere near you, even in the general vicinity. Sort of like during The Plague when those with the disease had to wear signs that said, "Unclean." Here is everybody, and way over there is Kristi Noem.
For all the obvious tone-deafness of the stories in her book and her Desperation Tour, what stuck me, as well, beyond all that, is that even if you make the weird decision to tell the puppy, family goat and horse stories because you think it makes you seem tough, there are such better ways to do it.
For instance, you don't say that the puppy's name was "Cricket," which is an adorable name and makes the puppy seem even more adorable than just calling it a puppy, which is pretty adorable on its own. And you don't write that when your young daughter came home, she asked, "Where's Cricket?" -- since, among other things, not only does that make you sound more cruel, but it shows that the puppy wasn't all that vicious and just because you hated the puppy, as she wrote, clearly her daughter didn't. Further, you don't write about the puppy running around chasing animals and having the time of its life, which shows it having fun and being happy around other animals. And you most especially don't tell the story about when you killed the family goat that you missed the first time and only wounded it, forcing the goat to be in pain as you tried to track down more bullets. And you leave out that what really bothered you about the goat that helped push you to kill it is that it ruined your children's clothes.
Oh, and separate from this is the reality that Kristi Noem is actually banned from 17% of the land in her own state of South Dakota. Really. That's because she has been so horribly insulting to Native Americans (suggesting for reasons known only to her, but apparently still in her "macho tough" phase, that they're somehow involved the drug trade at the U.S.-Mexican border) that many tribes in South Dakota have banned her from their land. Not shabby for a governor.
And yet, the Kristi Noem "Killing the Puppy was OK" Reclamation Tour rambles on. On Sunday, she was on Face the Nation, face-planting once again.
When asked if she'd met with Kim Jong-Un, the best she could offer was, "I've met with many world leaders." So, that would be a big "no," then, right?
But the best comment was, "Some of these anecdotes shouldn't have been in the book." Like, seemingly, the ones about killing the puppy and family goat, and also the lies.
It's like she's unaware that reporters question her won't have read the book or read articles about it or fact-checked anything. Or not have a dog. Or know anyone who has a dog. But still, she goes on the interviews, unprepared, hoping the be picked to be a heart-beat from the presidency. Floundering on her one with no one within sight to throw her a lifeline.
But, of course, above all, for someone who wants to be a Vice Presidential nominee or even be re-elected as governor, or be elected to any position, it really shows a total lack of awareness to not understand -- putting all that aside, which is a ton to put aside -- that almost all people actually like puppies. And would be against killing them.
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