Happy April Fools Day
Happy April Fools Day to one and all! (Though it seems like the past two years we've been celebrating it...But we haven't, today is special all its own.) So, here are the Top 25 headlines of the day.
Trump releases his college transcripts that show he knows almost none of the best words.
Ivanka Trump calls for prison reform in anticipation of her ending up there.
Melania Trump to finally give press conference on her immigration status and then surrender herself to ICE.
Trump acknowledges that Puerto Rico was, in fact, hurt badly by a disaster, and that it was him.
Don Jr. releases his father's tax returns by mistake, thinking they said "Jr." but didn't.
Nancy Pelosi says she practices Kabuki Theater on Trump.
NRA offers "thoughts and prayers" to itself in hopes it doesn't go to hell.
Lindsey Graham regains consciousness and says he has no memory of past year.
Trump praises Barack Obama.
Sarah Huckabee Sanders becomes first press secretary to take the Fifth while holding a press conference.
Ancestors of WWII Fascist leader Francisco Franco sue Republican Party for copyright infringement.
Trump explains typo in his bio that he doesn't "own" billions but "owe" billions.
Kellyanne Conway admits that half the time she has no idea what Trump is talking about.
Rachel Madow starts broadcast with news instead of 12-minute history lesson.
Vladimir Putin releases transcripts of his meetings with Trump just to get rid of them because they were creeping out everyone at the Kremlin.
Trump in negotiations with Lego for deal to build his Wall..
Tiffany Trump petitions court to change her name -- will drop "Tiffany" in place of "Never."
Mitch McConnell to leave Senate for "Some long soul-searching on what I've become."
Meghan McCain makes it through an episode of The View without claiming to be a victim of anything.
Tucker Carlson upset when people call him a "little Fascist" because he's actually 6'1".
Democrats will hold first debate in Houston Astrodome with spectators invited only if space allows.
Trump says it's unfair to say he hates minorities because he hates all people.
Mike Pence was replaced by Disney robot for six months and no one noticed.
Ethics Chief says Devon Nunes to be charged rent for time spent living up Trump's butt.
Trump resigns before Senate votes to convict him of impeachment 99-1 with Lindsey Graham the only holdout.
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Robert J. Elisberg is a political commentator, screenwriter, novelist, tech writer and also some other things that I just tend to keep forgetting.
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