Contemplating Your Naval Station

​And so, at least in small numbers – so far – convicted felon, adjudicated rapist and guilty business fraud Trump has sent the National Guard to Chicago. They haven't been deployed into Chicago just yet, but are sitting and waiting.  Apparently, unlike in Washington, D.C., there isn't any critical gardening work needed for the National Guard with in Chicago.
 
Well, actually, to be accurate, Trump hasn't sent them to Chicago, but rather to the Great Lakes Naval Station. And actually (again), Great Lakes Naval Station is so far from Chicago that it’s actually closer to Kenosha, Wisconsin.  So, maybe the military can patrol there, during its down time waiting for the Chipocalypse (tm Trump), where it might be more needed.  After all, Kenosha, which is on the Wisconsin border, is where they had protests in 2020 after the shooting of a Black man by a white police officer – and Kyle Rittenhouse drove up there and shot two men to death and injured a third. And for that matter, just up the road is Milwaukee, whose murder rate is higher than Chicago’s.  So, the National Guard might indeed be more needed in southern Wisconsin.  Especially since Chicago’s crime, murder and robbery rates are all down, between 20-30%.
 
Great Lakes Naval Station -- between Lake Forest (where “Ordinary People” was filmed among the mansions) and Waukegan, the birthplace of Jack Benny -- also stands out to me because it’s one of the bases where my dad was stationed for WWII.  I remember him taking us back there as kids.  Great Lakes is only about 30 minutes from Kenosha.  But it’s around 50 minutes from Chicago.  Well… 50 minutes if there’s no traffic.  If the Edens and Eisenhower Expressways are backed up, you might need some K-rations to help pass the time.  And, of course, that’s only if you’re going to send the National Guard to the Loop, which would be a really stupid thing, unless your plan is to protect the Chicago Art Institute, Symphony Hall, Palmer House, Macy’s, and the Chagall and Picasso outdoor plaza sculptures.  Although, in fairness, it's possible that they'll go there with plans to bivouac at Navy Pier, which will be a much shorter commute -- although, unfortunately, if so, they'll be very disappointed to learn that it's been redesigned with shops, restaurants and even the Tony Award-winning Chicago Shakespeare Theatre (for "Best Regional Theater"), and Navy Pier is now a major tourist center.  However, being the military, maybe they can make a flanking maneuver and instead set up at the nearby Ritz-Carlton Hotel at Water Tower Place, if there are enough rooms.  After all, at least for now, they only need 150 if double occupancy.
 
Then again, you certainly aren’t going to send the National Guard to the North Side and Gold Coast on Lake Michigan, because with all the masks they’ll be wearing and arriving in unmarked cars, there’s a far better chance the upscale locals will think they’re being robbed and call the police on them.  And the West Side is where the solid white German, Czech and some Irish and Polish neighborhoods are, so the National Guard will definitely be avoiding going there, with no one they’d dare to arrest or deport, making it a waste of time.
 
That leaves pretty much nowhere els…well, okay, there is the South Side.  Though I hope they know that, in that case, the daily commute from Great Lakes National Station will be much longer every day.  Perhaps closer to an hour and a quarter each way.
 
Of course, they might prefer to send their convoy rumbling along Sheridan Road and Lake Shore Drive.  It will take much longer, but the drive is gorgeous.
 
The long commute aside, what I don’t understand most is that – at least at this point– only 300 National Guard have been deployed to “help protect” Chicago.  And this for a city with 2.7 million people.  At least in Los Angeles, they sent 4,000 troops in.  And that doesn’t count the few hundred Marines.  (And accomplished nothing positive.)  So, I’m really not sure what impact Trump expects from 300 soldiers in Chicago – unless the impact he’s going for is pure, visceral hatred.  And who knows, maybe they’ll send in more troops.  Unless, of course, they get diverted to Kenosha.
 
But it’s Great Lakes Naval Station that most leaps out to me.  That’s because it’s where one of my favorite stories about my father occurred.
 
I don’t recall if this took place before, during or after WWII.  But he was stationed there at the time.  He was a doctor, so he and my mother got transferred to various bases around the country – Minneapolis, and near Seattle in Bremerton are two others that I recall.  But it was when at Great Lakes Naval Station that my dad saw an ad in the newspaper for a free pen that an insurance company would send you, just for writing in.  No string attached.
 
It was a nice pen, my dad thought, so he wrote to the company for one.
 
A few days later, he received a phone call.  It was from an insurance salesman from the company, telling my dad that he’d got his order and would love to bring the pen over.  Now, my dad knew that the only reason the guy wanted to come over was to sell him insurance – which he did not want.  And so, the conversation went along these lines.
 
“No, that’s okay,” my dad said, “No visit is necessary.”
 
“It’s no problem,” the insurance man replied.  “I’m happy to come by.”
 
“That’s okay, I just want the pen.  You can send it here.”
 
“Well I’m going to be in the area anyway, so it will be convenient.”
 
“I understand.  But I just want the pen.”
 
The insurance salesman didn’t give up easily.  “I’ll be happy to bring it,” he again replied.  “Just tell me when would be best.”
 
“There really isn’t a good time.  I just wanted to get the pen.”
 
“Right.  But it’s easy for me to bring.  I’d love to.”
 
“No, that’s fine.  You can just send the pen,” my dad said yet again.  “That’s all I really want.”

“Well, I have it for you.  I’ll bring it over.”
 
It was at this point that my dad was sure the insurance man wasn’t going to give up.  And my dad really didn’t want a visit from him, trying to sell him insurance.  Which he did not at all want.  The only thing he wanted was that nice pen, no strings attached.  And that’s when he had an idea.  And what he said – you must understand – was 100% true.  It just was a massive exaggeration.  But – it was true.  And what my dad then replied was –
 
“Fine.  You can bring it over.  Although,” he carefully added, “I should warn you that I’m a doctor, and we’re doing medical experiments here.  And so, there’s a chance you could get tuberculosis.”
 
There was a pause.  And the insurance man said, “I’ll send you the pen.”
 
It was true.  They were doing experiments on TB at Great Lakes.  And one could get tuberculosis.  But, my dad noted, the chances were about 1-in-250,000.
 
A few days later, the pen came in the mail.  And, he said, it was a nice one.
 
That’s Great Lakes Naval Station.  About an hour from Chicago.  About 30 minutes from Kenosha, Wisconsin.  With, for now, 300 National Guard members, untrained in policing, are stationed to make the 2.7 million residents of Chicago even safer than its 20-30% drop in crime is