I can't quite explain how unique, totally unexpected, almost ethereal, and utterly adorable this video is. But then, it needs no explanation other than the background given in the tweet.
Sorry, sometimes I get pissed off enough by the White House and its coterie of soulless acolytes willing the further the cause of fascism that instead I prefer to watch the overwhelming, heartwarming love that a parrot has for a little boy, and his love and giddy appreciation of it in return. There are plenty enough other people standing in line to push back today and take the quislings to task.
Okay, so instead here is the bird and the boy, once again from the fine folks at the Dodo. The pure joy and affection permeates everything here. Most little kids that age would probably be freaked out by having a bird swoop in on them just once, let alone all the time. But this is just joyful spirit, the perfect cleanser for an administration that has less compassion than a little boy -- and a parrot.
A fellow from Scotland decided to bicycle around the world. Early on, a very young kitten who had been abandoned decided to chase after him. And this video tells you the story.
But it only tells it in a 3-minute cursory way. If you want far more wonderful details, the Washington Post has the full story here. Hopefully you can read it with a subscription. If not...well, the video from the wonderful folks at The Dodo does an endearing job.
I've been reading a lot lately about Republican officials trying to outrage the far-right base by railing against how the Green New Deal shows that Democrats want to ban cows. Now, there are two possibilities here: first, either those GOP officials are smart and rational and don't truly believe Democrats actually want ban cows, so they're being deceitful demagogues attempting to spread manic frenzy to what they know is a foolishly-idiotic, breathtakingly-gullible, mindlessly-trusting base about an insane issue of banning an entire species that couldn't be done even if it was real -- or second, they themselves are so rabidly ignorant as to actually believe that Democrats really, truly, honestly want to ban cows There are no other options. It's one or the other. I suspect the former, though given the existence of Louie Gohmert (R-TX), I don't discount the latter.
In response, I was planning to make a cogent, meticulously-prepared, eloquent argument to explain why there is absolutely zero in the Green New Deal or on any scrap of paper among Democratic files or even private diaries, let alone in imaginary thoughts, that says or suggests they want to, in fact, ban cows. But as I started to type my treatise I realized..."Wait, stop! This is insane." If someone honestly needs convincing that Democrats don't want to ban cows, then there is no force on earth or in heaven to convince them otherwise. It's not only something they want to believe because it fits the fantasy scenario they've created in what they refer to as their minds, but something they need to believe in order to justify a world where thought is too scary a concept, so relying on others to tell them how to behave and lead their lives is their only way to survive.
Therefore rather than try to convince them that they are wrong, I figure that the only other thing to do is explain why banning cows is such a wonderful idea, so that they might understand and support the proposal with a full and open heart.
After all, for all those on the far-right upset at Democrats wanting to ban cows, they have to remember the most important thing: that there is no Second Amendment right to own a cow. So, cows don't have a Constitutional protection. As those who believe in Original Intent, if the Founding Fathers wanted cows protected, they would have written it down. Saying, "You will have to pull this cow out of my cold, dead hands" is meaningless. Not just because it's not worth giving up your life for a potential steak or dish of ice cream -- especially when there are so many other delicious choices, like lamp chops or a bowl of sherbet -- nor because most people have never even held a cow in their hands, but most people wouldn't want to.
Nor would you really miss cows. Seriously, after you're 12 years old, how often do you even have milk? Maybe to smooth out your bitter cup of joe a bit, and you can use non-dairy Coffee-Mate (tm) for that. And it's only the liberal frou-frou elite who need foam for their double-latte, and there's sheep's milk and goat milk they can use, after all, which I'm sure foams up wonderfully. Hey, even coconuts can provide milk in a pinch!
If cows were really important, and necessary (beyond not being in the Constitution), they would have a major organization dedicated to their protection and proliferation, to make sure everyone had a cow, or even two. But there is no National Cow Association. No NCA advocacy group trying to convince Americans that they need cows to keep them safe -- because, after all, let's face it, cows are pretty gentle creatures so benign that for countless generations young kids have had fun simply tipping them over. No NCA lobbyists pushing Congress to maintain your cow rights. No spokesperson offering thoughts and prayers every time a cow went to the Great Cow Pasture in the Sky.
In fact, quite the contrary, people actually appreciate it when cows bite the dust, because it means more roast beef, hamburgers and barbecued ribs. (Which, to be clear, can all be replaced with tasty dishes from other farm animals.) So, to cry out to protect cows when you're regularly hoping they get butchered makes zero sense.
Hey, it wasn't all that long ago we we did ban cows, albeit in small amounts and just briefly, to protect US from Mad Cow Disease. And people made it through just fine. Don't think of that as just a temporary occurance, but a test run that worked.
And if there are some of those people who just simply couldn't do without cows, they could always import frozen steaks from abroad (though there might be high tariffs) -- or save up to take a Beef Lovers Trip overseas or to Canada.
But if in the end cows went the way of the dodo and became extinct -- well...honestly, extinction has never been a great concern to the far right. For many decades they've even fought against environmental protections for species about to disappear. So, starting now to "care" about cows seems unlikely and far too hypocritical for even those to whom hypocrisy is almost like breathing.
Contrast that with all the benefits from banning cows, from the dangerous hazard of them wandering onto roads in the face of onrushing cars -- to the ability to help save the environment for our children and the future from the absence of ozone-depleting methane gas in cow farts.
And if all of that doesn't convince you of the great many reasons it's right to ban cows, then you're probably just a tree-hugging, cow-loving liberal snowflake.
In the end, though, there is really just one, final argument against trying to convince people that they're wrong about the Green New Deal.
And it's that anyone who actually believes Democrats want to ban cows is not voting for Democrats EVER. And there's a 34% chance they would not be voting, period. Partly because they don't think enough to care to vote and partly because they couldn't find their polling place
And once more, we head back to the wonderful folks at the Dodo whose description in their tweet explains this quite nicely. Or to put it another way, this is perhaps the star of a new party game called "Duck -- duck -- duck -- duck -- ...DOG!"
The other day, I posted a video of a man rescuing cats after the California wildfire. To keep a good thing going, here's another endearing rescue video from the wonderful folks at The Dodo.
Trump may not have cared about what happened with the California wildfires, but here's one impressive guy who did.
Because Trump is giving his State of the Union speech -- and no, I don't intend to watch, but look forward to Stacey Abrams' response and the subsequent analysis with clips -- I thought that I'd go instead for beatific and life-affirming this morning to prepare myself. And not just one, but two Adorable Animal Videos, since I think a double dose is needed.
These two are different, but similar in theme -- a person helping nurture animals in distress. This first is from the wonderful people at The Dodo.
The second is much shorter. And doesn't do much -- it doesn't tell a story (those the text does) but just shows the aftermath. But what it does show is A+ Prime. And glorious.
The theme today is -- Perseverance.
On Monday, I posted a wonderful and utterly unexpected video of a cow joyously playing game of fetch, racing after a ball and kicking it back to its human. (If you missed it, you can check it out here.)
The video was all the more funny to me, since it was related to a story of why I was so especially amazed seeing a cow run so fast, since my observation had always been that they just slowly lope along. And that was brought home so vividly when I was driving along the Maine countryside. This was in 1988, when I was working on the Stephen King movie Pet Sematary during my dark days doing unit publicity. I had a day off, and when tooling through the countryside, I saw a group of cows off in the distance of a very large, open field. I stopped the car, and got out to look at them. (Which by itself is probably an odd thing for most people to do, I would imagine. “Hey, let’s stop the car and look at cows!!” is not a phrase too-often heard, I wouldn't think.)
Anyway, as I stood looking at these cows, I noticed that one began very slooooowly meandering towards me. And then another. And another. And then one-by-one, almost all of them. It was a very big field, so it took a long time, maybe three or four minutes for them so ploddingly made their way over. And once they all got there – they simply stopped at the fence and starred at me. And stayed there starring.
It was hilarious and adorable. But it also drove home a couple points for me – how social and curious cows were, which I’d never had a sense of. Social and curious enough to want to see that human person over there a couple hundred yards away. And social enough for all of them to want to do it together.
But it’s that memory of how slooooooowly they all lugged their way over which stood out and made the video of that one cow running around playing “fetch” so hilarious and wonderful to me.
And as semi-proof of it all, when the cows all stood by the fence looking at me, I took a picture -- and here it is! You can see in the background where some other cows are how far then came. And you can even see a few more cows still making their way over.
Robert J. Elisberg is a two-time recipient of the Lucille Ball Award for comedy screenwriting. He's written for film, TV, the stage, and two best-selling novels, is a regular columnist for the Writers Guild of America and was for the Huffington Post. Among his other writing, he has a long-time column on technology (which he sometimes understands), and co-wrote a book on world travel. As a lyricist, he is a member of ASCAP, and has contributed to numerous publications.
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