“This Ebola epidemic could become a global pandemic, and that’s another name for plague,” he said, almost rapturous with Christian brotherhood. “It may be the great attitude adjustment that I believe is coming. Ebola could solve America’s problems with atheism, homosexuality, sexual promiscuity, pornography, and abortion.”
Right, he is. And not just mere paltry attitude adjustments. There are many other problems, too, that an Ebola plague could solve.
The threat of nuclear war
Unsolicited phone calls during dinner
The heartbreak of psoriasis
Loud and obnoxious children
Climate change
Silent and repressed children
Waiting for the cable repairman
Terrorists
Pacifists
The New York Mets
Divorce
Crotchety old men
Crotchety young men
Racism
Email spam
"Fox News"
High unemployment
Having to get up in the morning and go to work
Fighting rush hour traffic
Obesity
Left wing radicals
Right wing extremists
Christian broadcasters